July 99

...I called Lou this morning, I said, "Lou, I'm 56 years old, I put in 30 years at the Phone Company and retired, I've adopted 10 kids. Since my 'word', my hand shake and my personal check aren't worth spit to you... and, I don't feel like driving to Valencia again, I guess you'll have to find someone else to buy your truck." He said "OK"

I feel better...

I took the Buick in to get the right rear tire balanced, Christy said she could see it hopping on yesterdays trip to Riverside. I think the kids at Affordable Tire think I'm lonely, I have been in there three days straight... they offered me a job... cute.

Drove to Burbank and got some parts for the old vacuum cleaner. Checked out some trucks, bought some hubcaps for the Buick, and a tub of Canola Butter for Christy. Am I correct in assuming that technically, that could say that I "bought a grocery"? Sounds logical to me, since there was only one item. I went grocery shopping and bought a grocery...

I am still thinking about Sheldon...We sent some flowers to Judy, Christy tried to call her all day and didn't get through...we are both concerned for her...

Christy ordered pizza from the "Pizza Place" they have a new delivery guy, it is amusing to watch them drive around the valley looking for my place, this kid drove by 4 times... we are easily entertained up here.

Yesterday, when we were in Riverside, Autumn had a seizure by the pool, it seemed a little more involved than the others I have seen and seemed to last longer, but I wasn't sure. She had another one today at about 1300 and still another at 1700, this time the whole left half of her body seems to be involved, she is so weak on her left side she falls over from a sitting position. We have called Dr. Dillard our Pediatrician and we will take her in to see what her Phenobarbital levels are. I don't like Phenobarbital, she hates the taste (I've tasted it and I hate it too) but it seems like there ought to be something better for her...

...Christy took Autumn to Kaiser for a blood test. We will get the results Monday. Autumn has been seizure free all day

I repaired the vacuum, what a hassle, new fan, new bag, new cord... The fan was a bear because the old one was frozen on the shaft, had to disconnect it from the cord and take it to the shed, put it in the vice and hit it with a hammer and punch. The wires on the new cord were too short to reach the switch so I had to splice a piece of wire and solder it together. The bag was even tricky to replace.

Went to McD's with the kids and looked at some more trucks... I just want a big truck... a big old truck... a big old cheap truck. I'm in no hurry ...

...The Fourth of July Parade is today at 0900, I'll take the kids and Christy will take Autumn to church. There will be a pair of Stealth's and an F-16 doing a fly-over to start the parade and the pilots will land at Edwards and get a police escort back so they can bring up the tail end of the Parade.

We got down to the parade at 0830... We got a nice spot opposite the North side of the school... now, what you need to understand about the Acton Parade is if you aren't in it you damn well better be watching it. The parade is too long and kinda hick, and a little disorganized, and just plain peculiar sometimes but it's just about the best parade there is, anywhere... period. I really enjoy it.

The Stealth Fighters came over right on schedule, it was a little foggy to the north but they made an impressive entrance coming out of the clouds. They came back three times, the F16 came by too, once by itself and once escorted by the Stealth's.

We had a Boy Scout Color Guard to start the Parade, the lame announcer we had felt it was necessary to instruct everyone to take off their hats and put their hand over their hearts. What a weenie, he announced it with a tone of voice that implied that if we didn't he would kick our asses. Why do I let red neck pinheads like that upset me so. Everyone always shows respect to the Flag here, by making a remark like that he was showing disrespect for everyone in the crowd. Oh well... let it go Pete.

There were carloads of Queens and Princesses from every town from Agua Dulce to Rosemond and from Leona Valley to Pearblossom. We had antique cars too, the traditional Model Ts and Chevrolet's but there was a 60 year old Dodge Flatbed, a 1947 Crosley (sp), a "real", 100% accurate reproduction, of a Butterfield Stagecoach, and a mule drawn John Deere Trash Compactor. I have mixed feelings about seeing cars I have actually owned being driven with the Antiques. Time flies when you're having fun. I learned that when a llama wants to take a dump it won't move, no matter what, A Diesel Kenworth with air-horns as loud as the USS Kittyhawks wouldn't disturb it, and it tried... repeatedly. There were kids on bicycles and old men with funny hats riding go-karts, The Honorary Mayor and the Real Mayor who are both nice fella's. There were several Equestrian Drill Teams, and a contingent from the Acton Rehab Center, kind of a pathetic bunch of misfits, but they fit in somehow. The Fighter Pilots didn't make it back in time because they made so many passes, I think they felt sorry for us because it was so overcast at the beginning of the parade. Their wives and children were on the last float and got a lot of applause. Pilots on the ground are just like everybody else, I'd rather see them in the air than on a float...

I saw several people I knew Steve Trotta, Sherry Bragger (Who was in the parade with her husband Urich (aka Rick)), several of the teachers from Acton School were there too....and lots of kids, Danc'n in Acton put on another good show, Calie attends classes there. I took a lot of video to show her when she gets back from camp. We had a pretty good time.

We went to McD's and we beat the rush, five minutes after we arrived the place filled up with parade participants...

Christy, Tim/Mike and I cleaned Calie and Cindy's room, absolutely awesome pile of stuff came out of their rooms, it is all in trash bags about 3 feet deep covering the living room... We worked from about 1500 till 2130 and just barely made a dent. Their rooms are clean but the living room looks like a trash truck dumped it's load in the middle of the floor. We should be able to get it all cleaned up in the morning... I think.

...We finished (almost) cleaning the mess out of the living room. We had to stop at noon so we could drive to Van Nuys to go get the kids off the camp bus. We got there at 1315 at exactly the time the bus was supposed to arrive but it was there already and had been for 15 minutes... Calie was the first one off and gave mom a big hug and then she jumped into my arms... so did Christian, and I got a big hug from Cindy too... they were all telling stories about their adventures simultaneously... what a kick...

I went to get their stuff, Cindy's luggage, Cindy's sleeping bag and Christians sleeping bag were missing... oh well, we called the camp and they promised to send it down next weekend... Next weekend we send Mike up there. The drive home was full of excited talk about winning races, feeding the bear, riding horses, swimming, and they sang silly camp songs... what a kick...

At about 2000 we packed up the kids to go find some fireworks. We usually go to Lancaster but we were running late and decided to go to Palmdale High instead... good decision. They put on a real good show, what surprised me was the show the neighborhood was putting on, They had everything from legal little sparkler things that burn up in the street to Firecrackers, M-80's, bottle rockets, and real fireworks. The cacophony was impressive... we are usually out in the desert above the Lancaster Fairgrounds on the Fourth, I had no idea that this was going on in town... it was a huge block party...

On the way home we passed a herd of firemen putting out a brushfire, there were sirens everywhere... scary...On second thought I think I will stay out of Palmdale on the Fourth Of July.

But remember when it all seems too much

Take care of the minutes and the hours will take care of themselves

-Lord Chesterfield Letters to his son -

(Thanks Jerry)

7/5/99 Monday

...Christy took the girls and went one way and I took the boys and Autumn and went the other. I bought Lumpy a bicycle... a nice one, a Mountain Bike with shock-absorbers and 6 gears. I also made the mistake of buying his brother Tim/Mike a Play-Station game, so Lumpy rode the bike about 15 seconds... and they went in and played video games.

Christy is teaching "Vacation Bible School" (for some reason those three words in the same phrase clash resoundingly) tonight from 1800 till 2000.

I dropped all the kids off at Christy's Church except Autumn. Autie and I hung out together. Autie is such a good pal, we went shopping and bought some ice-cream and Popsicles, she loves Popsicles, she calls them pah-si. When we got home I gave her the vile elixir (Phenobarbital) and put her to bed with a Barney Tape, I computed for a while and heard her whimper, I went in and laid down with her, we sang the Barney Song she cuddled me and went to sleep on my shoulder. I suppose I could love her more than I do at this moment... but I just can't imagine how.

I stayed up till 0230 last night writing in the Journal and I'm tired, Christy isn't home yet though and it's 2130... she should have been home an hour ago... her PCS Phone is laying on her desk... I'm going to bed....

7/6/99 Tuesday

...Tim/Mike and I had another visit with the Russian... I had my camera and took some candid pictures, I thought she knew I was taking them but she was unfamiliar with digital camera's, they make no sound. She was amazed when I showed them to her on the LCD. I left and picked up the other kids then when I got home I got a call from her ... and she was pissed. When I stop to think about it I guess she has a right to be upset. It seemed like a good idea at the time, I told her I would trash the pictures and I did...

I went shopping for a bike for DaMoke and dropped off some film that the kids had taken while they were at camp at the 1 hour photo place. Their machine was giving them fits so I will have to get them tomorrow. I wonder if they give discounts for inconveniencing people. The One Hour commitment is, after all, their own self applied obligation to my expectations. We found several bikes but none that met her stringent requirements, I will try again later in the week.

Had another evening alone, almost, Christy took off at about 1730 with all the kids and went to VBS again. Christy's friend Bonnie called and said Christy wanted me to pick up Tim/Mike and "B" because they were being disruptive. When I got down there she had changed her mind. When I got home I got about 3 more calls from Bonnie saying that Christy should call her ASAP. She said Chris was having trouble with Tim/Mike. When she got home I found out that she was having trouble elsewhere. Apparently kids were picking on Mike because he couldn't read, and (According to Mike) they got on his case as soon as he walked in the door "for no reason." Now Mike can dish it out but he can't take ridicule at all. Not from anybody & especially not from teenagers. Tim admires teenagers, he thinks they are all the smartest and the coolest things what are. I guess they really gave him a hard time... he was in tears when he got home. I wish I had been there to know for sure what really went on. I wonder what sort of Christian ethic they were practicing. It seems to me that when religion becomes a weapon that somewhere someone has missed the point... Christy was really upset, more disappointed than anything else I think. We are awfully protective of him... he is as hard as glass...

Christy got in late again, the kids were all buzzed ... there is a period of time (between 1930 and 2100) where it is essential for us to get the kids in bed... if we miss that window they get a second wind and it's like trying to put toothpaste back into the tube...

7/7/99 Wednesday

... I spent most of the day on the PC trying to get caught up on my e-mail

I had a long 'chat' on ICQ with Eric M, Eric lives in Pennsylvania and is married to my niece-in-law(is there such a relationship?) Heather Noel. Now, Heather was about 2 when I first met her, she crawled up on my knee and told me stories, she was totally adorable. I was trying to make a favorable impression on Christy's family and not making much head-way. Heather was the first of the Rodgers Clan to take a shine to me (After Christy)... she broke the ice, she will always be special to me. (No pressure Eric). Did I mention that Heather turned in to a "drop-dead-gorgeous" woman? Well she did... Eric, send me a picture... or I will use one of mine

Her sister Holly Nicole, I mentioned her in one of the past issues, she is also a Pennsylvanian, and she is also "drop-dead-gorgeous" and recently gave birth to Nathaniel, the worlds chubbiest baby and the favorite toy of his big brother Donavan, this can not be disputed... I have pictures.

7/8/99 Thursday

...Cindy wouldn't wake up and "B" was a bear... I gave up on Cindy and took Tim/Mike and ""B" the Bear" to school. When I got home the phone rang, it was Tim/Mike informing me that we had forgotten his medicine, I drove back down. Tim and Mrs. W. were waiting... she seemed relieved to see me for some reason.

I picked up the kids camping pictures they are, with 2 or 3 exceptions, awful photographs...but priceless. Pictures of feet, chairs, a cage with nothing in it, the top of a tree, someone's nose, teeth and one eye, Calie had a story for every one of them...

Christy took Tim/Mike to Wal-Mart to get clothes and stuff for going to camp, she took Calie too... Christian was at his buddy Anthony's house

I took Calie to Dance, dropped off the House Payment and went to the ROF.

7/9/99 Friday

...I tried a little house cleaning but didn't make much headway, the kids are just too good at making messes... we have been invaded by ants... surprise, surprise. I spent the day cleaning and cussing miscellaneous un-named, short, co-habitants of this dwelling who let Popsicle's melt behind the couch and leave other untold ant delicacies under cushions and bedclothes.

7/10/99 Saturday

... Tim got booted from church, I had to go pick him up. Apparently he violated some sort of code of silence and touched someone's bible... poor boy ... damned to perdition.

I had planned to have the family sit and watch the Women's Soccer finals. Christy had to take one of her fellow parishioner's home, so I watched it by myself. I am thoroughly impressed with everyone on that team, it's a good thing their not orphans or I'd have to adopt them. Their composure was really exceptional and exuberance was contagious. Both teams were first rate and the game was as close to mistake-free as I have ever seen.

Christy had told the kids she would take them to see GrandMa/Pa in Riverside, that only means one thing to the kids "SWIMMING" the kids all love to swim... The kids had fun, Autumn in particular, she swims like a bowling ball but she loves the water. We have to watch her like hawks because she will crawl into the water in a heartbeat. Coming out of the San Bernardino Mountains and into the Antelope Valley we saw an incredible lightning show this is "Monsoon" season.

I have a DoughBoy-like thing in the shed that needs to be set up... I will try to get it put together next week, beats driving to Riverside.

7/11/99 Sunday

...Well, it's Monday and for some reason this program neglected to save the entries from Friday, Saturday and Sunday... Grrrr. I have only a vague recollection of Friday ...

I watched "Sunday Morning", then I took Tim/Mike to Target for swim trunks and a beach towel. He told Mom that he had a swimsuit when in reality all he had was Levi cutoffs, cutoffs are verboten. I picked up donuts and headed home.. The plan was to drop off Tim in Van Nuys at the bus that will take him to camp and then go to Riverside. We dropped him off and went over to the 101 and drove through LA to the Pomona Freeway. I haven't been out the Pomona Freeway in 15 or 20 years, I remember cornfields and vacant land it used to be a boring but pretty drive, I may as well have been going through Compton... How can it have gotten built up and run down in only 20 years?

I dropped off Christy and the kiddies and picked up Christy's sister's husband Blaine... I had a mission from a friend to go to Riverside Memorial Cemetery on a personal matter. I needed Blaine to show me the way, it turns out his brother is buried there, He was at the funeral but he never went back, I think he had some issues to resolve too. Anyway, that done we went back and picked up the kids and took them back over to the pool...

On the way home we heard that there were some ferocious storms about and that the San Bernardino Mountains were getting clobbered... that's where we have just sent Tim/Mike. We tried to call the camp when we got home but there was no answer... I called in the morning and the word is that they had an exciting evening but everyone is fine and the weather is beautiful...incidentally, there were 5 injured and one killed in flooding the next canyon over from Camp Cedar Falls...

I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What good would that do?

- Ronnie Shakes -

7/12/99 Monday

...We called the Social Worker about "B" again today, he said the funding is available to admit him to Devereux Center, we just have to wait for a bed to become available. This episode of "The Never Ending Saga" is destined to be traumatic. Emotionally, I feel a little like I have let "B" down. The rational me says that "B" has "Big League" problems and I am not equipped to deal with them... my parent side is very anxious for him...

Christy got the kids home early 21:00, she usually isn't back till 22:00, I was on a roll writing E-mail and trying to finish up last weeks Journal, when the kids come through the door, every ounce of creative inspiration I had goes out. Oh well, I will try to write again later...

7/13/99 Tuesday

...I went to CostCo and picked up the rest of kid's pictures they were, as expected, awful. I had taken in a roll of film from the non-digital camera too; some of those were in last weeks Journal...

I called The Devereux Center on "B" again... a move seems eminent. They said they are waiting for Social Workers for some of the older kids to be moved and a bed should be ready soon, first week in August at the latest... but they said one would be ready in mid June too. I am concerned that "B" isn't making any progress here, if he is going to be helped it has to be intensive and it needs to begin soon. I sense that every day we (Chris & I, DSS and Devereux delay his placement there is going to compound his problems. "B" is so confused about his place in the world and that uncertainty and confusion lashes out at every opportunity... he is a very angry little guy

I went to Best Buy with Autumn, "B" and Christian, there was a 'manager' at the door saying that "the phone lines were down and they were going to have to close the store." I said "Huh?" She patiently explained that without phones they have no links to all the networks they need to work the check validation machine, credit card validation computer, inventory control, the place is totally adrift without phones. I looked around and noted bulldozers on two flanks South and East...that smells like a 'cable-cut' to me... poor babies... they couldn't even accept cash... how did we ever survive without computers and telephones. If we ever loose our electronic infrastructure we're going to die. There is nobody left that knows how to do anything manually. Does anyone else sense that we are in a precarious position? The Millennium Bug is a precursor to our vulnerability to our technologies. I am a little sorry that the "Y2K disaster" is destined to be an anticlimactic fizzle. It would have served as a wake-up call for the world if everything came to a screeching halt for a while.

7/14/99 Wednesday

... I finally pulled the pool out of the shed. Monica immediately went in the house and put on her bathing suit and life preserver, she cracks me up. I told the kids "the moment I look around and I am the only one out here working is the moment quit working and go inside.". This is a Doughboy type pool It has never been out of the box. I need to get sand from the road below and start leveling a section of the back yard. Taking the pool out of the box was exciting, there were two, then three, then five mice living in the box, Christy is of no help in these situations, Eeew repeated over and over does nothing constructive. After emptying the box and seeing if the mice had done anything irreparable I discovered two more deceased ones in the little tank gizmo that cleans the water... took about 30 minutes to get them out Eeew.

We set the pool on the ground in the wind and did all the steps in the instruction sheet and realized there was a four-inch discrepancy in the height of the north side from the south. Trying to pare off 2 inches of adobe is like trying to remove two inches off the top of a concrete driveway... I wet it down, went inside waited about 4 hours and got the rotor-tiller 2 hours later I was ... close. Poor Mokie... I will try again tomorrow.

I had to move the MotorMonster to make way for the van full of pails of sand. I walked around it twice and put up the awnings and closed the storage compartment doors and walked around it again just to be sure. I went about 40' and heard a snap twang noise the snap was the little door that covers the compartment for the 30 amp cord popping off, the twang was the 30 amp cord separating from the extension... Every one knows the "...because you're too stupid to own a computer" joke, I suspect I may be too much of an airhead to own a Motorhome.... The door had been popped before and was easily repaired and the cord wasn't damaged...

Cards Christy took two girls and I kept the rest with me... I was in Palmdale and Chris called to have me go home and get some "Thank you" cards she left on the stove. I called the church to make sure the blank "Thank you" cards were what she needed and it wasn't a stack of filled out cards elsewhere that she really needed, I wasn't wasting a trip back into Palmdale. I got some person who had no idea who Christy Daggett was or what I wanted with her... but she put me on hold... for 15 minutes. She came back said "Hello" and hung up. I called again and Chris answered they were the cards she needed...

I dropped the cards off and took four hungry, irritated little kids to Der Weinerschnitzel well Autumn wasn't irritated but she was hungry and when Autie gets hungry you better feed her quick or she screams, loud, high pitched, and often. It's funny to me but most people find it annoying. What she is saying is DAAAA!.... EEEER! DA, is me and EEER is here, she points to the table where I am supposed to put the food when she says EEER. Thankfully we are the only people in the place... Half way through the meal "B" starts in on DaMoke and Mokie clubs him then "B" accidentally kicked Christian as he takes a swing at DaMoke. Christian then kicked him back threefold... So, sensing in my fatherly way, that the situation wasn't going to improve I sent "B" to the Van and made Christian watch Autumn while I packed up and left...

7/15/99 Thursday

... Kids to school and kids brought home. Christy took DaMoke and Calie shopping for a dress before I got home with the kids... I tried to clean house a little but was interrupted with referee duty between "B" and the world. I managed to work on the pad for the pool and I think I am close but I can't set it up alone... When Chris got home we tried to clean but her leg is inflamed again and she had to lie down... I took Calie to dance and ran out of gas in the LRP (Little Red Pontiac). Luckily I was able to coast into the Shell Station. I decided that I required a break and went to Don Cuco's for some Beer, Chips & Salsa. I didn't know anyone there, so I had my Beer and left. I am not a particularly gregarious sort of guy...I noted to a friend the other day that, I get really stressed when I am in a position where I have to talk to strangers. It's some sort of residual childhood thing... 10 or 12 years of Mom saying; "Don't Talk To Strangers" eventually sinks in I guess, and then all strangers are a threat... Hmmm, never really thought about that before... It may even be pretty close to the truth. I really don't like being alone among strangers and I don't like being alone period. What a pathetic paradox.

7/16/99 Friday

... Two weeks of Summer School down and one to go. With just three kids in, it is actually a bit of a pain... If I felt that any of the three were gaining anything out of this it would be a different story. Well, I don't think they are being helped and it is really frustrating. My kids are walking on glass, they need a lot of intensive help, and they aren't getting it. We have a lot of well-intentioned teachers, doctors, and other "professional" types without the training they need to deal with drug exposed kids. They can't be diagnosed, typed and labeled like other "Special Needs" kids. Without knowing what drugs were used at one time in the gestational period they have no idea what part of the brain is damaged... other than a lot of theoretical clap-trap and "medicine" (read: more drugs) we get no support...

We have created a new kind of Psych-doctor that treats symptoms because they can't figure out what is really going on. All of my kids but one take some sort of drug to get through the day. I hate it, but there seems to be no other alternative. Hell half my grown-up friends take something to get through the day... probably more than half... Maybe part of my problem is that I don't have any drugs to take (Except Mevacor for my cholesterol, and an aspirin for my heart) I wonder if I would be a better "Coper" on Prozac.

7/17/99 Saturday

... I had lost my keys while I was in Milwaukee last month. Avis called my sister in Scottsdale to inform her that they had found a set of keys in the van they rented. Sue knew I had lost my keys and called me, I called them and the package arrived today with somebody else's keys in it, along with a pair of prescription sunglasses. What a pain, now I have to start all over again with them. The recording you get when you call Lost and Found at Avis is about 5 minutes long including the beeps about 50 of them.

Calie is spending the night at a friend's house... she has stayed over night there before... I'm not worried... too much... hardly at all actually, sort'a

Tim/Mike called from camp... he wants to stay another week, luckily we can do it for him this year. He is really having a blast, he has been water-skiing all week and next week is Soccer Camp, and he met a nice girl... he's only 11. Why do they have to grow up so damn fast...

Autumn and I went shopping... Autumn likes the front seat with the window down and the wind tossing her hair around. I know she likes it because she waves her arms and kicks her feet and screams and laughs loud enough to make people in the next lane stare at us. Autumn is really getting under my skin, I take her with me most everywhere I go now.

I went out and bought Microsoft Office 2000 today, I wish it was changed a little more. For the money I want to see dramatic changes not subtle ones. There are some neat changes... Outlook has improved its mail handling capabilities quite a bit. It's almost as good as Netscape... I like the way the programs all have the same 'feel' to them, I want to make something in MS Publisher, it seems to have changed the most. George said He doesn't need another Cogswell Newsletter till after the reunion in October... rats.

7/18/99 Sunday

... I tried to load Office 2000 onto the Laptop... took for ever, got to bed at 0200.

If you have trouble getting your children's attention, just sit down and look comfortable.

- -

7/19/99 Monday

...Stayed up trying to make sense of the world... lost cause, I played with email, got caught up... mostly. Worked on my Journal... It was hard for some reason, I ended up plagiarizing my own e-mail for stuff to put in the LHC (Snippets). I have been saving that Tinky Winky thing for a month...

7/20/99 Tuesday

...Put the finishing touch to the Journal and sent it out... Started moving things around in the office I moved everything on the left side to the right and vice versa... what a chore. I busted Christy's new desk in half... a thing that cost's that much shouldn't break apart that easy.. I replaced the cheap brads with screws, it's stronger than it was and as the man said " A fella riding by on a galloping horse wouldn't notice the repair"

7/21/99 Wednesday

... Spent the day filing ...crap... most of it got filed in the dumpster. It is truly amazing how fast crap accumulates, all you have to do is let your guard down for a year or two and things can get away from ya... So much paper comes into this house, it really is boggling, between the Department of Children's Family Services, Shearson, Smith Barney, the Schools, the kids... what do you do with 7 caterpillars made out of pipe cleaners and cut up egg cartons. I think the teachers get graded on the number of pounds of paper they send home... some of it is absolutely precious but it is forcing us out of the house...

It seems as though I have been up and down all day, it amazes me we got so much accomplished. I took Cindy to Toys R Us so she could spend the $21.00 that has been smoking in her pocket for a week. I took Calie and Autumn too. I got coffee at the 76 Station and got 6 miles down the road and realized I forgot to get gas. I made it to the ARCO in Palmdale but it sputtered and died once before I got there... what an air-head sometimes it amazes me that I have survived all these years... I bought Autumn a Winnie The Pooh Desk and Toy-box  got it home and discovered (after assembly... of course) that the table had been dropped or hit on one corner... drove back to TRU and tried to exchange it... The computer said they had 2 left, the floor model and one in the back. I opened the one they had in the back because there was a telltale crinkle on one corner, sure enough it was damaged in the same spot as the one I just brought in... they offered me the floor model but it was scratched up pretty bad... what a waste... they gave me my money back and a $5.00 gift certificate... I put 100 miles on the van 100 divided by 14 x $1.37= $9.79 I am out $4.79 and one table.

7/22/99 Thursday

... Last day of Summer School. It will be a relief...

I went to IKEA wit Autumn, Cindy and "B" and Christy took Calie, Christian and DaMoke... turns out I got the better of the deal. DaMoke was a little demon and Christy eventually had to cut her shopping short. When Monica is in a foul mood there is absolutely nothing you can do with her. We went shopping for a desk for me a table really and some bookcases. Finally got it all together, paid for and loaded in the van... had to get creative loading the van but we did it.

New word for Autumn today "Mo' ma" that means Mokie. It's nor actually a new word for Autumn, she has been saying it for several days... it just took me that long to figure it out.

Mokie, Cindy, "B" and I unload the bookcases in the bedroom, I made it several years ago and I have never been pleased with it's appearance...

Bedtime was a real pain, it seems to get worse every night. Lately it has been Calie. She seems to turn into manic little dervish about 15:30 and get uncontrollable by 20:00. Tonight she found the "Calie Book", it has adoption papers and all the important stuff that identifies her legally, and there were some pictures of her biological Grandparents and four of her biological sisters. She has seen all this stuff before but tonight it seemed to trigger some sort of rebellion... she can be very nasty when she is in one of these moods...I have to remember she is only seven and refrain from getting too "real". There are things that we know about her biological mother that she doesn't need to know yet. We have a vague idea where her Biological Grandparents are and we haven't looked for them yet... we need to do that soon, from the picturehe looks to be about my age. I have a hard time judging the age of African Americans, men especially. I always peg them ten or fifteen years younger than they actually are, why is it, with the exception of Dick Clark, that dark skinned people age better than light skinned people? Do African Americans have the same problem with each other or with whites, I doubt it, old white people look old. Which reminds me is Tarzan an American African?

7/23/99 Friday

.., I cleaned in preparation for tomorrow's visitors. There are eight people in this house and you would think that we could clean a house in a matter of minutes... wrong. I suspect that the house cleaning efficiency is diminished by the factor of the number of people involved and also inversely proportional to the age of the participants. I spend more energy trying to get people to do... anything than it would take for me to do it myself. They learn instinctively at the age of 4 and a half that they can get out of work by being obstructionists. They take every instruction literally, take the towels to the laundry room means take the towels and drop them inside the door to the laundry room and go outside and play till dad starts yelling again. Then start all over again, pick up the toys means pick up a toy and play with it till dad starts yelling again... I have to find some inner peace somehow before dad starts yelling again. 

It's midnight, I have a Scottish Rock N Roll band called "Wolfstone" playing in the background on the PC  Fiddles and Bagpipes!... pretty amazing stuff. I mention this because my brain is in a phase three melt down... I have nothing to talk about, well not exactly, just nothing interesting enough to type. Now it's

If you have Real Audio you can listen to it too... Nothing like an Australian Harmonica Player playing Irish Jigs to lighten up the evening...

Every three or four years I have to immerse myself in some kind of music, in my genes i guess. I wish I could make music myself, I have tried but I seem to be cursed with a sort of eye-brain-hand dyslexia so instruments are out of the question. I have a fair voice but I can't remember songs, I can whistle pretty good but I have learned that whistling is only pretty to the whistler. It is like fingernails on a chalkboard to everyone else... I don't care how good you think you are... you are annoying.

Sometimes I can't get enough Mozart, then it's Celtic music that's the only thing, then it's John Prine, Dave Brubek,  ... my taste in music is pretty eclectic but I seem to have a hard time with electronic stuff. If I detect an electronic synthesized drummer or prerecorded and electronicly enhanced feedback I lose interest almost instantly... I think that that's my main problem with modern popular music, I like entertainers that have talent and let it all hang out, I am waiting for the world to get as fed up as I am with facade, The kids like flash, if you have a freight car full of nerve you can always entertain children. Some of the entertainers I see today have gimmicks and style and chutzpah. But no talent other than the willingness to do what ever it takes to get on the stage...  

7/24/99 Saturday

... We have invited some folks over for Pat's Birthday

Frank Rodgers = Father-in-law

Donna Rodgers = Mother-in-law

Karen Wilson = Sister-in-law

Blaine Wilson= Brother-in-law (Passed up this gala fete and went to Las Vegas with his brothers)

Pat McEilhiny = Sister-in-law - Birthday Girl -

Mike McEilhiny = Brother-in-law (Passed up this gala fete and stayed home)

We had a pleasant time, I was still cleaning when they got here about 13:30 but the house looked OK...

Poor Pat, she missed calls from all of her kids, Bill and Holly's calls went to her house after she left and Heather's came here after she went home...

We had something Christy called "Johnny Mazetti" for lunch. It's like Goulash, apparently it is an old family recipe, everyone seemed to enjoy it… I will remain politically non-committal.

Pat copied videotape that she took of her grandchildren when they were out here in May. It's one of those sorts of tapes only Grandmothers (And sisters of Grandmothers) love, baby's are cute but 2 hours of "Oh look, did'ja see that... he moved" wears on me after the first 45 minutes or so.

Cindy went over to her friend Julie's house to spend the night. They are going to go to the movies to see Inspector Gadget. The sophisticated LA Times reviewer said it ranks among the worst movies ever made but I seriously doubt that he is within a light year of the "Target Audience" I will get a review from Cindy tomorrow.

I have to get some sleep... Still no ideas for the LHC... damn, this is getting tough.

7/25/99 Sunday

...Christy banged her heel yesterday evening and it kept her up all night. I took the kids to the park to give her a chance to rest. I tried to get some pictures to put on the WebPage. I hope they come out ok....

On the way home from the park I picked up Cindy, we weren't even off the dirt road before she and "B" had a brawl... Cindy hadn't taken her medicine, either had "B"... my fault. I let them have it out because they are pretty evenly matched in strength, coordination and ferocity. Besides, trying tp stop these fights only seems to intensify their resolve to do one-another in.

Christy seemed a little recuperated when we got back, about 20 minutes later we took off for van Nuys to pick up Tim/Mike...

We were early but the buss was earlier... Tim/Mike was pretty glad to see us. He had had lots of fun and was appropriately covered with bumps and cuts and scratches to prove it... 

We got the pool set up but it will take time to fill it, can't pull too much water from the well or we'll have trouble later... we will probably have to call for a truck load of water later.

"The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously."

—Hubert H. —

7/26/99 Monday

... We got "the call from Devereux" today… "B" will be enrolled, if that's the word, on the 9th of August. I am not looking forward to this at all but at the same time I am anxious for it to finally happen.

Tim/Mike and I go to see the Russian tomorrow and then we go to see the judge about ending his Juvenile Parole on Wednesday. I have talked to the Probation Officer and she assures me that the ordeal is finally ended. Christy took him shopping for clothes to wear so he will look handsome for the judge.

This whole business still really galls me. I will endeavor to restrain myself from making any disparaging remarks in court but I need to write a letter to the Juvenile Court and call their attention to what passes for a caring, proactive court in the Antelope Valley. I understand that they have a boggling caseload what I resent is the condescending lip-service they spew about being a responsible, professional organization dedicated to helping the children. It's crap, they care about getting through the day and picking up their paychecks. There is a Bailiff there, a big tough looking black man named Henry who was the only one in the whole system that seemed to give a damn about Tim/Mike as a person. Every one else seems to be so afraid of the system they are in that they couldn't see past the "facts" and the case number to see a 11 year old boy caught in the system and scared to the core of his being.

7/27/99 Tuesday

...Tim and I met with the Russian, we talked about "B" going to Devereux Center. Tim/Mike's reaction was does that mean it will only be Lumpy and I in the room? 11 year olds are pretty self-focused… When we asked "Will you miss him" he said "Maybe, someday…"

I spent the rest of the day at Kaiser. I have an infected eye-sinus-?, it is driving me crazy, has been for two days… I got in and out in about two hours, not bad considering I was a walk-in.

7/28/99 Wednesday

... Tim/Mike and I went to Juvenile Court… He is through with "Supervision". I was so relieved I almost broke down… it would have been very inappropriate. I shook hands with Henry and tried to tell him I thought he was doing a good job but I was a little incoherent it came out kind of silly… I don't know why exactly that I was so emotional pretty lame… I have been caught up in the law before and I know that many times cases that should be cut and dry take on a life of their own because somebody sees a pot of gold or thinks the he can get some political mileage. When this started the DA wanted to "make an example of the little terrorist". I know that he could have made things very tough for us.

We talked with the kids about "B" going to Devereux , well I meant we tried to talk to them. They are all too young to grasp the ramifications of "B" being gone for an extended period of time. They have a hard time committing themselves to a 30 minute Cartoon show. As the guy said "For me, long range planning is lunch."

7/29/99 Thursday

... Christy is in Pasadena doing the NACAC (North American Council on Adoptable Children) (I think) she will be spending today and tomorrow there. The kids and I worked emptying the utility-room, it is so full of junk we can hardly get out the back door. I feel like I am re-arranging deck-chairs on the Titanic. This whole house cleaning process is just a pointless exercise in frustration.

7/30/99 Friday

…   This PC got cranky today. It wouldn't boot up because there was a "… CDMDS.DLL file overwritten by an older version… please reboot so Windows can fix it…". It wouldn't re-boot it would hang instead and I had to power off and then I would get the … "CDMDS.DLL file overwritten by an blah, blah, bla.. I didn't like the HP Version of Windows anyway so I reloaded Windows and all seems well… tedious process though… Christy is gone so it is hard to get much done, kids really cramp my style when it comes to cleaning, I have to stop every 30 seconds to resolve some catastrophe like ""B" threw dirt in the pool", or "Autumn is eating the photo album", or "Cindy won't let me in the bathroom" or… you get the picture… really tedious.

Went out back and the kids were running around inside the pool…I yelled at them to stop but it was too late. They had a pretty good whirlpool set up. The centrifugal force generated by 2500 gallons of water is pretty impressive. The little pool actually stayed together but the liner in the North side of the pool forced itself under the edge of the pool and the only way I can figure to fix it is to drain it and start all over again… well the kids got to play in it for two days… what a pain…

Christy got caught up in a seminar on CP at the NACAC Conference and didn't get home till 18:00, When she got home I started out for Albertson's with Calie to order a birthday cake. On the way to the car I noticed oil leaking onto the ground from the front of the MotorMonster… It looks like a broken hydraulic line… Calie mentioned that Lumpy and DaMoke were hiding in the engine compartment during a game of Hide & Seek… 2 + 2 = !*#!*$%

7/31/99 Saturday

…Pc went belly-up Started doing updates on the Laptop… can’t load Win 98, can’t get it to run at all except in safe mode… Took the kids to the park